Lions and Boys and Deer Oh My!
Over the summer, the boys and I took a trip to Clarendon. I took them there in order to meet up with their other grandmother, Grams, to go camping. If you have ever traveled with littles, you know that there is never a dull moment.
We all go out the front door and Joey yells *Front seat!*. He is the only one old enough to ride in the front seat so front seat it is! Jarrod and Vinny call backseat. Well...since there is only 2 of you left YES you MAY ride in the back seat. We all buckle up. Joey falls asleep before we are out of the drive and we are OFF!
Everything is going good and the do not touch your brother is at a minimum.
We start the descent through the back side of Palo Duro Canyon going about 50mph and that is where I made my mistake. I KNEW I was making it the moment I opened my mouth. My brain was slowly saying in its best bionic man slow motion nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooo but, my mouth, it just kept talking.
Me: *Look guys! Look at that deer.* I pointed to the dear as we drove past it.
Now I have been the mother of littles. I learned a long time ago that you either 1) do NOT point things out when driving in a car or 2) point things out about 6 miles ahead of time, slow down to 4 miles an hour and say there...there...look there...no right over there where my finger is pointing no stop that look there just forget it.
Both boys crane their necks looking out the windows of the OPPOSITE SIDE from the direction that I was pointing.
Joey's head is still rolling around from side to side snoring. He is only upright because of his seat belt. He missed the whole thing but he did not care. If he HAD been awake, the next 27 miles would have been filled with fun facts about how deer 1) are a part of the cervidae family 2) have hoofs with ever numbers of toes and 3) are the only animals with antlers and antlers are the fastest growing living tissue. I love all my grands but Joey is the one I will use as my phone a friend if I ever get picked for Who Wants To Be a Millionaire.
The two in the back: *I don't see a deer!*
Me: *You should have looked faster and in the direction that I was pointing.*
Vinny: *Why can't I see a deer? Turn around!*
Me: *Momdy can't. Sorry the deer is gone.*
Vinny: *aaahhh man.*
Vinny: *Why can't I see a deer? Turn around!*
Me: *Momdy can't. Sorry the deer is gone.*
Vinny: *aaahhh man.*
Jarrod: *I don't think that there was really a deer.*
Me: *Dude, there was too a deer!*
Jarrod: *Just because you SAID that there was a deer doesn't mean that there was one.* I look back into my rear view to see him grinning.
Vinny: *Oh man....~sighs~ I have always wanted to see a deer.*
We drive on a few more miles and then Jarrod looks at the window and screeches
*I SAW A MOUNTAIN LOIN!!*
Vinny: *Where? Where? I want to see the mountain lion!*
Jarrod pointing frantically at NOTHING *Over there over there look quick! Slow down Momdy*
Vinny: *SLOW DOWN MOMDY! I have ALWAYS wanted to see a mountain lion my whole entire life!*
Jarrod: *It's gone. She's driving too fast.*
Vinny ~wailing loudly~ * I never get to see mountain lions!! That is ALL I have wanted to do for my entire life! I never get to!*
Joey: *ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ*
Me: *Vinny, there is no mountain lion. Jarrod is teasing you. Jarrod stop that.*
Jarrod is smiling really big in the back seat.
I see a wild pig. I say nothing.
I see another deer. I say nothing.
I could have seen Big Foot at that point and I would not have said a word.
We go miles in silence. Blessed sweet peaceful silence.
Jarrod: *Did I ever tell you about the time that I petted a mountain lion?*
Vinny in a frenzy: *WHERE WAS I? WHERE WAS I? My whole entire life all I have ever wanted to do was pet a mountain lion!! Why do you get to have all the fun? Why did you get to and I didn't? Why? That is all I have ever wanted to do...pet a mountain lion!*
Jarrod: *We just left you at home and went and petted it. I think I see one over....*
Me catching Jarrod's eyes in the rear view *DON'T.YOU.DARE.* He just smiles his sweet smile.
Joey: *ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ*
......Momdy has never petted a mountain lion either
Children in cars are our punishment for making out in cars.
ReplyDeleteOMG! That is hysterical Cyn!
DeleteCyn wins the internet today.
ReplyDeleteI totally agree. Plus, I think it should be posted somewhere prominent.
DeleteThat is hilarious! As is Cyn's little funny
ReplyDeleteIt is always a circus with the boys Paula. And Cyn is always that funny!
DeleteWait - how did you get in the car with me? Oh - no - sorry. My kids are Henry and John. Wrong car. They have been waiting their whole life to see .... something - anything - you name it - guarantee it's what we just passed and they missed ;-) Funny thing - they have a Grams too ;-)
ReplyDeleteThat is too cool about the Grams! Jarrod still brings up the mountain lion. lol
ReplyDelete