Thursday, October 23, 2014

Even A Princess Has A Few Hiccups



 Regrets, I've had a few;  But then again, too few to mention.
I did what I had to do  And saw it through without exception. 

Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew  When I bit off more than I could chew.  But through it all, when there was doubt,

                     I did it my way".  ~Frank Sinatra



I am who I am because of my choices and the choices of those around me (*spits* damned free will) have made me who I am today. There are a lot of times along the way that I have stumbled and fallen flat on my face.   For those of you who really know me, I am pretty damned okay with who, what and where I am. Now,  I tend to think of myself as THE last piece of pie.  So, when I got to thinking about what regrets in my life I might have....it was not easy.  Sure we all have those silly little regrets like bad clothing choices (I had an awesome pair of MC Hammer pants that I wore when I was pregnant with Cade...glad that there are no pics!), hair styles and bad dates (he had a black shirt on with food stains down the front...and told me that he was going to convert me to the Church of Christ before the end of the date....why oh why did I even get in the car.  And no, still not Church of Christ).



1) Not letting my grandmother teach me how to sew.  I love it now even though I do not sit down and do enough of it.  The sounds of the machine, the feel of the fabric and removing Diesel from where I am cutting feels like therapy to me.  Maw's scissors holders hang on my wall and now hold my scissors.  I have a piece of green velvety fabric that I use off of every once in awhile.  I love to put little pieces of her into things.  I think that she would like to see that I am sewing now.


2)  Hanging on to people for too long.  I get a picture of how things are SUPPOSED to be in my head and hang on to people long after I should have let them go.  I see people for who and what they are capable of....not who they are in real life sometimes.  I have come to realize that some people really are just in your life for a season.  Either for your sake or for theirs.  Letting them go can be beneficial for both of you.  There are lessons to learn and lessons are not a bad thing.  That was really hard for me to learn because I can become addicted to people.


3)  Not writing more.  I sucked at the 31 days thing.  I tend to get discouraged when people do not hit that like button or comment.  Plus, I got to feeling like it was a throwing my blog in your face kind of thing every day.  I did not like that.   I lose site of the fact that my blog truly is for me...just me.  Anyone that comes along is just gravy.  Writing really does help me sort things out and I need to just make a point to write more often.  Might I say that my sister group stuck with me and I am thankful for that.  *waves at the tribe*


4)  Being afraid for so long.  I know it is hard for some of you to believe but, I was once VERY shy and afraid.  The Mindy you see now did not even exist in the mind of 16, 21 or even 31 year old Mindy.  I can look back and see that I have wasted a whole lot of time in being fearful and ashamed.  I let a lot of people talk me in to things and control my life due to fear.  There was nothing to be ashamed or afraid of.  But, once those things attach to you, they become like those *friends* in school that liked you and let them sit with you only because you had the good things in your lunch box.  Sure, not a lot of women can say they married the same man two different times and be proud of it but....those two times brought about the great things that I have ever accomplished.  I even thing I kinda rocked being a single parent.  Not to say I did not make my mistakes but....we all turned out just fine.  No ax murders in our gang of three.  Or, they are good enough at it that they have never been caught.  I do hate that my children remember that mom who was scared.  I still have some fear but now I see it as a more healthy fear.


5)  Not traveling more before now.  Man, you give me a plane ticket and I am so out of here!  I regret not having that spirit when I was younger.  I recognize it now and I am going to take every opportunity to see the big wide world and meet so many people that I already care for and love.  I even love that I have totally stopped packing in a bag big enough to hide a body in!  My little carry on and me are great friends.  It's wheels and I have been in several airports and plan on being in several more.  My regret with that is that I have not picked up a City themed coffee cup in each one.  But I am certainly going to start.  I think I need a gofundme account for traveling.  HA!


6)  My latest regret.....Not riding the roller coaster at New York New York.  I was going to do it on my birthday.  I mean...what a flipping awesome way to start out my 52nd year right?!?!!?  Talked about it for days....watched it!  Sent a post cards to my boys telling them I did it.  But....I didn't.  We decided to ride it at night.  Prefect right?!?!?!?  Watched people get off of it and noticed that they did not die.  I chicken out in line.  Flat ass chicken out and bolted.  I have regretted it every day since.  I am the girl with the *So she did* tat....not the so she didn't.  So, I have to go back to Vegas and not die on the roller coaster at New York New York.   I hope that there are pictures cause I am sure going to post them.  Or have Camille post them if I die. *winks*

.....I showed you mine...now show me yours....












Thursday, October 09, 2014

Thursday Thankfulness




 I have so very much that I am thankful for but, it's late....so I'll keep this list short.

  1. I am thankful for Camille who still likes to include me in her life and lets me hang out with her and her friends.
  2. I am thankful for Cade and his ability to tease with me.  But, I still will not let him sit on my couch while he is naked.
  3. That both of my kids love to say I love you and tell me every day.
  4. A savings account
  5. A new adventure
  6. Airplanes.  I would not have been a good covered wagon passenger.  Seriously, they would have left me behind with the first armoire.
  7. Doggy doors
  8. Early birthday gifts
  9. 51
  10. October
  11. Creamer
  12. Clean panties
  13. Foam roller core.  OMG...seriously, have you tried one?  You MUST!!
  14. Photos
  15. You
 And so...what about you?  What are the little things that make your heart go aaaahhhhhhh?



Tuesday, October 07, 2014

Lions and Boys and Deer Oh My!



Over the summer, the boys and I took a trip to Clarendon.  I took them there in order to meet up with their other grandmother, Grams, to go camping.  If you have ever traveled with littles, you know that there is never a dull moment.

We all go out the front door and Joey yells *Front seat!*.  He is the only one old enough to ride in the front seat so front seat it is!  Jarrod and Vinny call backseat.  Well...since there is only 2 of you left YES you MAY ride in the back seat.  We all buckle up.  Joey falls asleep before we are out of the drive and we are OFF!

Everything is going good and the do not touch your brother is at a minimum.

We start the descent through the back side of Palo Duro Canyon going about 50mph and that is where I made my mistake.  I KNEW I was making it the moment I opened my mouth.  My brain was slowly saying in its best bionic man slow motion nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooooo but, my mouth, it just kept talking.

Me:  *Look guys!  Look at that deer.*  I pointed to the dear as we drove past it.

Now I have been the mother of littles.  I learned a long time ago that you either 1) do NOT point things out when driving in a car or 2) point things out about 6 miles ahead of time, slow down to 4 miles an hour and say there...there...look there...no right over there where my finger is pointing no stop that look there just forget it. 

Both boys crane their necks looking out the windows of the OPPOSITE SIDE from the direction that I was pointing. 

Joey's head is still rolling around from side to side snoring.  He is only upright because of his seat belt.  He missed the whole thing but he did not care.  If he HAD been awake, the next 27 miles would have been filled with fun facts about how deer 1) are a part of the cervidae family  2) have hoofs with ever numbers of toes and 3) are the only animals with antlers and antlers are the fastest growing living tissue.  I love all my grands but Joey is the one I will use as my phone a friend if I ever get picked for Who Wants To Be a Millionaire. 

The two in the back:   *I don't see a deer!*

Me:  *You should have looked faster and in the direction that I was pointing.*

Vinny:  *Why can't I see a deer?  Turn around!*

Me:  *Momdy can't.  Sorry the deer is gone.*

Vinny:  *aaahhh man.*

Jarrod:  *I don't think that there was really a deer.*

Me:  *Dude, there was too a deer!*

Jarrod:  *Just because you SAID that there was a deer doesn't mean that there was one.*  I look back into my rear view to see him grinning.

Vinny:  *Oh man....~sighs~  I have always wanted to see a deer.*

We drive on a few more miles and then Jarrod looks at the window and screeches

*I SAW A MOUNTAIN LOIN!!*

Vinny:  *Where?  Where?  I want to see the mountain lion!*

Jarrod pointing frantically at NOTHING *Over there over there look quick!  Slow down Momdy*

Vinny:  *SLOW DOWN MOMDY!  I have ALWAYS wanted to see a mountain lion my whole entire life!*

Jarrod:  *It's gone.  She's driving too fast.*

Vinny ~wailing loudly~ * I never get to see mountain lions!! That is ALL I have wanted to do for my entire life!  I never get to!*

Joey:  *ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ*

Me:  *Vinny, there is no mountain lion.  Jarrod is teasing you.  Jarrod stop that.*

Jarrod is smiling really big in the back seat.

I see a wild pig.  I say nothing.


I see another deer.  I say nothing.

I could have seen Big Foot at that point and I would not have said a word.

We go miles in silence.  Blessed sweet peaceful silence.

Jarrod:  *Did I ever tell you about the time that I petted a mountain lion?*

Vinny in a frenzy:  *WHERE WAS I?  WHERE WAS I?  My whole entire life all I have ever wanted to do was pet a mountain lion!!  Why do you get to have all the fun?  Why did you get to and I didn't?  Why? That is all I have ever wanted to do...pet a mountain lion!* 

Jarrod:  *We just left you at home and went and petted it.  I think I see one over....*

Me catching Jarrod's eyes in the rear view *DON'T.YOU.DARE.*  He just smiles his sweet smile.

Joey:  *ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ*



......Momdy has never petted a mountain lion either

Monday, October 06, 2014

Black/White

This is my favorite picture of my daddy and I.   He has been heavy on my mind lately.  I've had two dreams where he made cameo appearances.  Both times he was doing something for me.  LOL Of course he was, like he always did.  He loved me fiercely and without strings.  When I get sad about his death, it is because I know that no one will ever love me again like he did.  Then, it makes me very happy to know that.....no one will ever love me again like he did.  No one.  
  I would not trade places with anyone.



 .....one lucky duck indeed.

Sunday, October 05, 2014

Pinterest Sunday--Aloha Bread


Pinterest is one of my biggest addictions and internet time sucks.  Oh, I do so love my pinterest.  As of right now, I have 60 public boards and 2 private one.  

LOL....yes Siree Bob I do.

I have a tendency to pin and pin and pin.  My boards grow and grow and grow.  Yikes!

I am trying to weed some things out.  So, every Sunday I am going to try to do one thing that I have pinned.  I'll either keep it or delete it!

I started with Aloha Bread.  I found the recipe over at Lovefoodies

Ingredients:
1 Package Yeast
1/4 C Warm Water
2 Eggs
1/2 Pineapple Juice
1/3 C White Sugar
1/2 tsp Vanilla
1/4 C Butter melted  (real butter...always real butter)
4 C Flour
1/4 tsp salt

In a small bowl, dissolve yeast in your warm water.  Let is sit for several minutes until it is bubbly.  If it does not bubble, your yeast is no good.  (This is where I veer from the recipe.  When I proof yeast, I always add at least 1 Tbl of sugar.  The yeast will eat the sugar and really do so much better.  The additional tablespoon of water is not included in the recipe.)

In your mixer bowl, beat the yeast mixture, eggs, pineapple juice, 1/4 C water, sugar, vanilla and melted butter (mine was not melted but soft....it mixed up just fine.) When mixed, gradually add in your salt and flour.  Mix slowly and let it all incorporate.    I change my beater to the dough hook and let it run for several minutes until your dough is pretty and soft.  You can choose to knead it by hand if you want.  I just wanted to avoid the mess.  :)

Cover and let stand for an hour.  Oh my, I have a thing for pretty yeasty dough....
Punch the air out of your dough and divide it in half.  Keep dividing until you have 16 pieces.  Butter your pans and plop your rolls in.  (plop is a total technical term)   Let rise again for an hour.

Bake for 15-20 minutes.  (mine took 20)  Brush with melted butter when you take them out.




 I got the idea that these were going to taste like Hawaiian Bread.  I guess I thought that because of the name and the pineapple juice.  They didn't straight out of the oven.  Cause...I might have slathered them in butter and ate some while they were still hot.  Like smoking.

I tried them again when cool.  (Well of course I did!)  They were actually better cold.  They are very soft and slightly sweet.  The recipe is a keeper.  It is also a really good bread recipe for someone who has never made bread!  It comes together really well without too much fuss or muss.

 

...do I have butter on my chin?

Saturday, October 04, 2014

Great Things Come In Pairs


 So, we return to find our heroine on the phone in her office with her PA....and looking pretty damned cute I might add....

  The PA was so sweet to me.  She told me that two things concerned her.  First was that the mass did not show up on the mammogram.  Secondly, she normally gets results in 24 hours.  These results were sent to her within 45 minutes.  She told me that the decision was hers.  She also told me that, if I was her sister, she would tell me to get a biopsy.  She asked if I wanted her to make me an appointment with a surgeon.  The appointment was one week from that day.

Dammit.

In the meantime, I had things to do.  One of those things was to get my mom back and forth to have cataracts removed.  My mom is a worrier (there should really be a bigger word to describe that) and I knew it would cause her problems so, I kept it on the down low and only told a few people.

On September 15, the nurse explained to me what would happen.  A sonogram would be done.  Then he would decide on if anything needed to be done, a needle biopsy or a core biopsy would be done.  She then explained how both of those procedures would be done if I had to have it.  I loved that she wanted me to be informed before hand.  She told me that it would take at least a week to have results.  Well,  I have always been a lucky girl so....... guess who got to have the core biopsy?!?!?! 

THIS GIRL!!

The sweet sweet nurse draped my breast and washed it with betadine.  I laughed and told her it looked like a really bad spray tan.   She then moved to my non-lump side and it all began.

Doc numbed the area with a shot and then took what looked like one of those guns used to pierce your ears and started.  It had a needle that is that is several inches long.  He inserted it several times and took about 8 samples. 

And you know what, it was the most interesting thing EVER!!!  I got to watch the whole thing.  He would insert it and it made a loud POP and he would take out a sample.  It was so very cool!

Then all of the samples were put into a little jar and labeled. He then told the nurse to make me an appointment in two days.  She looked at him....then looked at me....she said but...  Two days? He nodded yes.  Then he looked at me and said "Well, this is big but try not to worry too much.*  I totally could have done without that last sentence.

The next day, my left breast looked like it had been the airbag in a really bad collision.  I have never seen more vivid greens, purples and yellows.  I was so impressed that I wanted to show everyone!!  However, I refrained.  Well, I might have shown a few.  ~winks~

I even thought about posting a censored picture here.  I didn't.  You are welcome.

Two days later, I am sitting in the same room again.  He came in fumbling with my file and sits down.  Then a male nurse comes in and stands by the door like I might bolt and run.  The surgeon looks at my paperwork and then looks at me.  He says "Good news.  You have a large fat necrosis.  They normally occur when there is an injury to the breast.  It does not have to come out but they some times become painful and I would suggest that you have it removed."

Do you know what a fat necrosis is???  DEAD FAT.  Well, OF COURSE THAT IS WHAT I HAVE!!

So, I am very thankful that I do not have breast cancer.  I'll take the lump of dead fat over cancer any day.  I will be scheduling an appointment to have it removed.

Please....PLEASE do not hesitate to have a mammogram.  Many cities offer free or low cost ones.  If you don't know where to start, call your doctor.   I do not even have to pay a co-pay with my insurance when I get one.  If you do not have insurance, a doctor or don't know where to go, the Susan B Komen Foundation can help you with that.  If you need me to come hold your hand, I will be happy to...either physically or virtually.

Even though it IS squishy, your girls will be happy that you did.



.....dead fat....sheesh