I was born Melinda Ray Morris on October 13, 1962. My middle name is after my grandfather on my mom's side. I have always loved it. My mom told me that the whole side of my daddy's family was there and so excited because I was the first grandchild to be born on that side. I like to think about them all being there waiting for me. It was a Saturday.
LOL....I don't actually remember that....I was told.
I got married to the ex the first time in September 1981. I took his name and have carried it around every since. Even when we got divorced for the final time, I kept that name for my children's sakes.
Since then, one got married and got a different name. The other got smart and ditched it. There is no one by that last name that I love or care for now or vice versa.
But here I am still toting it around. I have carried the name for 34 year. I have done the best that I could with it. Even though I am not fond of it, I spiffied it up and made it count for something. I made it mine. I have made it a good name. It's now a name in my world that people hear and not roll their eyes at. I've made peace with it. I think I held on to it for so long because I thought that I would eventually get married again and change my last name.
I have come to terms with the fact that I will, more than likely, never marry again.
OMG....I would have been married 34 years this year. That kind of blows my mind.
No one gets it right. My last name is always butchered in some form or fashion. Shoates...Kahote...Chocolate....Chote.....the list goes on and on.
Even the COURT wrote it wrong on the docket!
When I first got this job, I hade a supervisor that called me by my last name. Only by my last name. She honestly had no idea how I felt about it or how it still stung. I hated hearing it roll off her tongue for so many different reasons. First, because I thought that there was no honor to that name. Secondly, because it was disrespectful. By using my name against me, I was kept at arm's length. That was finally resolved and we eventually became best friends.
I have grown a lot in the last 34 years. I do not even know who that girl was. She was so young, full of hope and horribly naïve. Sometimes, it is like watching a Life Time made for tv movie with an actress that looks kind of like me. A very skinny actress.
I just know I love who she eventually became.
I have done all I can with this name. It no longer suits me. I have outgrown the name Choate. I have carried it for as long as I could and I am ready to give it back.....in better condition than when I picked it up.
I got fingerprinted at the Sherriff's office last week. Then I went to the District Clerk's office and filed paperwork and paid my $248.00.
SURPRISE! It's a GIRL!