I am at a not so pretty place in my life that I cannot seem to escape just yet. I am working on it but it seems like for every step I move forward...something drags me back. That is really unlike me. I try really hard to be happy and joyful but &%#^@*&^% it just ain't working fast enough. So, I decided that I am going to create a *things I hate* list. LOL Maybe we can get some of the negative out of my system and make more room for the positive.
1. I hate raw onions. OMG there is few things worse than biting into a burger that you have asked them to hold the onions on and your teeth and tongue finding that one crispy crunchy raw onion . aaaccckkkk! Especially when you have been eating that burger and have been lulled into a false sense of security until you are about halfway through and you bite down on that one TINY piece that explodes onion juices all over your mouth. (BTW I order my burger with no onions, no tomatoes and extra pickles. I love tomatoes but not when they have gotten all hot and sweaty)
2. People who do not put their buggies up in parking lots. Makes me so MAD! Are we such a entitled lot that we cannot be bothered to put a buggy back where it belongs? Those people should be made to have to carry those groceries on their backs and their buggy privileges revoked.
3. People who call and hang up...call and hang up...call and hang up...call and hang up continuously when I do not answer. This happens a whole lot at work. It is so bad that my message on my answering machine warns people against doing it. Do they listen? Nope. I can be in a meeting with someone and a person will try to call me. When I do not answer immediately, they begin the cycle. The record is 31 times in a row. I watched. I am totally passive aggressive that way. Nothing makes me want to punch a person in the throat like that does.
4. People who wear their pants at half mast. I don't make you look at my granny panties...I don't want to see your undies.
5. The word retarded. There is no use for that word in any context. I almost feel the need to apologize for typing it out.
6. People who do not take down their garage sale signs from poles all over the town. I think we should staple them to those poles for as long as their signs have been up. I also think we should use LOTS of staples. Or go to their houses at 6am on a Saturday demanding to buy something from them. Just saying.
7. Eating something and someone then reading OUTLOUD the calorie content of what I am currently shoving into my mouth. Yeah...thanks for that.
8. Raisins. *urp* Just like eating little flies without wings. Or what I would assume eating flies would be like. *urps a little more* I REALLY hate them when I think something is raisin free and then BLAMO there the little sneaky bastard is.
9. It's a blinker people. It comes equipped on your vehicle for a reason! Use it!!
10. People who text....read...apply make-up....while driving.
11. Grey's Anatomy, Dancing with the Stars and Private Practice. You might as well just stab me in the eye with a grapefruit spoon. I used to think it was cause someone in my life just LOVED those shows so I suffered through them. But we also watched Son's of Anarchy and I still freaking love that show so it's obviously cause they suck.
12. WHEN PEOPLE TEXT, IM OR TYPE IN ALL CAPS.
13. The word turd. I do not know why that word bothers me. You can use poop, shit, caca, poo or crap and it does not bother me like the word turd.
14. People who say *my bad*. You don't mean it. If you do you say *I apologize*. My bad minimizes the importance.
15. People who threaten to *unfriend me* cause we have different opinions. My friends run the gambit of ultra conservative to very liberal. I love them all and love their passion. Does not mean I always agree. I love my friends for who they are and not what agenda they hold dear. I think people are more than that. That's what makes us interesting! But do not think I have to conform to be your friend. You are either IN or you are OUT. Makes me no nevermind.
16. People who do not listen to me. If I tell you I need something...I honest to goodness need something. I rarely ask for things. If I ask you to be patient with me or give me time or space....I mean just that. If you chose to leave my life because what I am asking does not work with your time frame...well....I guess you are on the losing end now aren't you? If you cannot honor that then I really did not need you in my life now did I?
17. Lies. No No No. Just...no.
18. Men who let the nails on their pinkie fingers grow long. *gag gag gag* I think you are either using that nail to help you snort drugs or your really digging for gold in your nose. Now, I think most everyone picks their nose at some point and time in their lives. I just do not go around with that mental image ~shudders~ like I do when you have that gosh awful long pinkie nail.
19. This funky, dumb, uncomfortable, freaky place I am in right now and the look people get on their faces when I, once again, open my mouth and dumb words come out.
There is my list. I wonder if you made it this far. I say all of that, part in poking fun and part in total dead ass seriousness to say this..... I know I am a freaking mess right now. I promise you I will not always be in this place. Please just love me and hang on for a little bit longer.